OK so for starters I am a Starbucks barista and I started not too long ago and the first shift I had I met this really attractive guy who also works there he’s my coworker when we first met he just kept on staring at me and I wasn’t going to talk to him cause I was like oh god he’s staring at me he’s probably judging me or something but then he talked to me first I think we really hit it off he’s really quiet tho my other coworkers have told me and I’m like not around me he literally “makes fun of me” like we argue but like you know on a joking way and stuff he’s not very social during work but on break and off of the clock he is because theirs a lot of work to be done he’s kind of nonchalant tho but what really is getting to me is that he walks with me and waits for me after work EVERY TIME and we talk but he just really likes to tease me A LOT but like I said idk if he’s just being friendly or not it’s also quite early in the stages but like it’s really bothering me does he seem interested or is he just being super friendly LIKE AM I BEING DELUSIONAL OR AM I ONTO SOMETHING?! Keep in mind im a 18 year overthinking delusional girl…😭😭😭 like im lowkey as dense a brick sometimes

I was seeing this guy for about two weeks, and we went on around four dates. I genuinely really liked him as a person. He was kind, caring, respectful, made me feel safe, and from everything he said and did, he seemed to want a serious relationship. I felt like we had a lot in common and that we could actually be compatible in a relationship.
The problem was that I didn’t really feel physically attracted to him. I wasn’t repulsed by him or anything, but the attraction just wasn’t there. On our fourth date, we kissed and things became more intimate, and we ended up going to his place. We didn’t have sex, but we did make out and there was some touching. And that same night, I told him that I thought we should stop seeing each other because I wasn’t feeling the romantic/sexual attraction I thought I should be feeling.
He was actually very respectful about it, which made me feel even worse because I really did like him as a person. We agreed to cut contact and leave things as they were.
It’s been about a week now, and I’ve been thinking about it a lot. I’m starting to wonder whether I made the decision too quickly. I keep thinking about how well we got along, how safe and comfortable I felt with him, and how he had so many of the qualities I’d want in a partner. I don’t suddenly feel physically attracted to him, but I do feel like we genuinely fit together as people, and I’m wondering whether attraction could possibly grow with time.
He’s also leaving soon for three months for work. I’m considering texting him and asking if he’d be willing to meet once before he leaves, just to talk in person. I don’t want to lead him on or make him think I’m suddenly asking to get back together, because I honestly don’t know what I want yet. I just feel like I may have closed the door too quickly and I don’t want to regret not giving it another chance to see how I feel.
Would it be unfair or confusing to contact him again after I was the one who ended things and we agreed to stop talking? Or is it reasonable to ask to meet once and have an honest conversation?

There’s this girl I’ve started to like recently. I’ve been wondering how to strike up a conversation with her. I know we have a few mutual friends, but we’ve never actually talked. On one hand, I’m a bit afraid my buddies would laugh if they found out, but on the other, I really care about this. Do you have any ideas on how to get things started? We’ve never had the chance to get to know each other better, and it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen anytime soon.

So im at this table at a bar with a group of people. Me and this woman next to me were talking. We were having a good conversation and then a group of guys just left to smoke so it was just us. She and I both realized late asf.

She asked me: Did you see where the guys went?

I said: No, I was to busy focusing on you I lost track.

Then she said "aw stop" and then grabbed by arm and smiled.

Was this a flirt?

I've had so many mixed responses about this but basically my old housemate and I had a house party about 6 months back, and I beat him in a game of beer pong, and afterward we shook hands and he did a little finger tickle thing on my palm and I had no idea what it meant. Anyway, I looked it up a little while later and found it means romantic/sexual interest? Does anyone know?

I'm going to see him tonight (so far we're just mates) and we are having dinner at a house where he is house sitting... Just us two.. (Haven't done that together before)

I just became single this summer, and I really like this girl who studies abroad this semester and returns in january. I want to make a move, but I'm not sure how since she is away.

The vibes between us were always extremely good, but just naturally stopped since I was in a relationship. I really want to explore this now that I can, but I want to find the right balance between making my intentions clear and giving her space while she is away. How would you do this?

I thought I'd start by messaging her asking how its going with her studies, and then tell her that I am single now, and then just see where it goes from there.

I don't want to make the mistake of coming on too hard, but I don't want to waste any time either.

I, 32M, am being teased to a female workfriend, 28F, by our circle of friends as if we are a romantic couple. Take note that the i am married and happens to have a playful personality.

One time, I asked a favor to the female workfriend to help me carry some heavy items. Our conversation goes like this:

Female workfriend: (carries the heavy item) "i wont be able to get pregnant carrying these"

Me: (shocked) "i do not know how to respond to that. Hahaha"

FW: "speechless? Hahaha"

M: "do you want me to answer it? Hahaha"

FW: "you're crazy. Hahaha. Yes"

M: "well you started it hahaha. I will answer that question once i am ready"

Is this already flirting in your POV? Was I the one who flirted, the female workfriend or both? 😅

I am autistic and had struggled with social anxiety for most of my life but lately I've been more extroverted and have been trying to be more outgoing. How do I flirt with someone, like should I just try to flirt with someone I know I'll never see again or should I try to with people I'm actually close with?

So she normally tease me with random things like

Why are you standing there are you stupid

Go open or fix something

I am the one who broke it when smth is broken

1 miss and Im the worst player oat

Calls me blind bc I couldnt see the school bus and also congrats me when I get in the bus etc.

And just today she just randomly turned to me and said

[My name] leave the classroom.

Before that we had me not understanding anything bc I said I dont get it to a random question at math class.

And today I felt like she was staring at me so I looked at her and she moved her eyes away.

We almost have smth new everyday even my friend found out I had a crush and my another friend thinks every romantic thing I say is about her idk where did he even guessed it. He is in the same class with my crush's friend might be smth like a gossip idk.

I'll prob do tons of updates bc somethings happen everyday lol.

I’ve been going to the same bakery about 2–3 times a week for the past few weeks. There’s a girl who works at the counter, and she seems to recognize me now.

She remembers what I usually order, and one time she actually added an extra bun to my order for free without me asking. When I scanned my rewards barcode, she also said my name. She usually maintains eye contact with me while we’re talking and smiles.

Then, a couple of weeks later, I went in again and told her what I wanted. She said something like, “Oh yeah, you always get the croissants.” She was smiling and maintaining eye contact again. Before I left, she said, “I’ll see you next week?”

I’m wondering if this is just good customer service because I’m a regular, or if there might be a little bit of flirting/interest there. I don’t want to be delusional and interpret normal friendliness as flirting 😭

Also, we’re both women, so I have no idea if that changes how I should interpret any of this.

I’m considering telling her that she has really pretty eyes because I genuinely think she does, but I’m worried that might be weird or too forward.

What do you guys think? Does this sound like flirting, or just a friendly employee recognizing a regular customer?

So basically, girl. In my class is pretty cute and I find attractive, one day on the bus she was giggling a lot and..it just seemed odd for her to do. Then she acknowledges that I was absent for 2 days of school and then shares her notes with me. Before this were just regular friends who didn't talk that much to each other. Am I being weird for thinking that was kind of flirting, nothing similar has happened to me in my life From a girl

Hello guys, so as a delivery driver M(32) for a company where I deliver to that store about once a week there's this divorced young women F(30) (cashier at the clothes store) who I used to have small talk with once in a while about the job or the mall, I wanna know if she likes me enough so I could ask her out.

So, I had to deliver a couple boxes today and from the start she was friendly but a little bit more than usual. At the start she asked if i'm okay and If I was sure that everything is okay because I "look weird" in a jockingly tone.

After I drop the boxes she had to sign my pad and then write the time in it but she looked at her watch, looked at the time and as she's writing the time she asked me what time is it. Mind you she clearly knows the time because she wrote it even before asking me. I told her don't you know the time and she smiles and said no.

Then she proceeds to ask me if I'm still with my girlfriend because two moths ago we had a 5 minutes conversation about relationships and thats how I know she's divorced. I told her no, we are no longer together and she acted surprised. We couldn't talk any further because she had clients to take care of but as I was leaving the door she told me bye have a good day as usual.

What do you guys think? She's muslim I think so I don't wanna get my hopes up but I really like her as a person because I being doing deliveries for 2 years and she always treats everyone with respect and doen't give off a snob vibe. Besides I really like her face and the way she dresses. Is she's interested or just a friendly person who just acknoleges my existence and nothing more?

whenever my friends asks me for advice and all im able to tell him something good n all but when its my turn i go blank

I (25M) am pretty confident with woman and overall people, I have tried and succeeded in starting new friendships and knowing new people. I have it hard to express sexual and romantic desires due to fear of rejection and failure, so I often drag to friend zoning myself and assuring that I’m not part of the deal.
I’ve had some rough experiences this past few months with rejections, so I try to think practical approaches to handle it better.
And to express desires better, and that I’m sexually attracted to someone.
I’m on the autistic spectrum so everything I’ve learned is from experience and teaching myself human behavior.

(For some context, I'm 20 and in college)

Three days ago, I went out to a club with my friends. I didn't know my friends had invited a guy I find really cute (he's a friend of theirs). Naturally, I got a little nervous (I never planned on making a move because I think he's really out of my league). At the club, everything was normal until I went to the restroom; I bought two cigarettes and ended up giving him one. After that, we spent time talking and dancing together. Later, I had to go to the restroom again, and he offered to walk me there. I said sure, but he told me to link arms with him, which I found odd since the club wasn't crowded and it was easy to walk around, but I just went along with it. He waited for me to come out, we went back to the table, and then I walked him to the entrance. Again, he asked to link arms. My friends kept saying we should kiss, but I was a bit shy, so I just acted like it was no big deal. Afterward, we went to my place for an after-party, and that’s where things got really weirddd. We walked there, and the whole way we were linked arm-in-arm... again. When we arrived, two friends went to lie down in my bedroom while the rest of us kept drinking until we got sleepy and lay down on the carpet. I was just lying there normally when he told me to rest my head on his arm; I hesitated at first but then said okay. We stayed like that for an hour while he stroked my arm and hair. I fell asleep but was still somewhat aware of what was going on; he kept pulling me closer. It felt really sweet and intimate, but we were drunk, so now I don't know if I should take this as a sign of some kind of interest or if I should start talking to him more—like, maybe make the first move?

My friend asked him if he’d ever go for it and kiss me or hit on me, and he just said "maybe," so... What should I do?... Was he flirting?

I'm going insane (He also said I looked like I was really into him, like I wanted more than just cuddling... I don't know, I hadn't thought of it that way, and he was the one who suggested sleeping on his arm, so it was strange to hear him think that)

So I've been single for 3 years (24f) and I would love to work on my confidence to approach someone. One thing that makes it really hard for me is that I get sooo nervous when a guy is good looking I can't look into his eyes. It's like i'm being controlled by some higher power

A few days ago a group of people was blocking the sidewalk, I almost collided with this angelic-looking guy. We both gave an awkward laugh; I really regretted not saying anything, I just panicked immediately. Just turned around hoping he would turn around too but that was just my unrealistic fantasy 😄

I get approached frequently and when someone speaks to me, I feel very confident, but the other way around, I feel like a mess and lose all my confidence.

Do you have any advice for me? I really don't want to use dating apps again ;(

I’m awful at reading signals if someone’s flirting and need help.

I (male) was at a music rave. It was dark and boiling hot, so half way through the night I took my top off. As I was walking to the bar, a random girl points at me and without saying anything puts her finger in the centre of my chest. I look down at it thinking she’s point something, then she flicks it up tapping my nose and smiles. No words were said. Have I completely misread this that she was just being friendly.

I’m a 19-year-old guy, and there’s a girl I’ve been friends with for a while. She’s very kind, friendly, and has a lot of male friends. She hasn’t really shown any obvious signs of romantic interest before.

Recently, we met at a club and hugged as friends. Later, she took my hand and moved in front of me so that I was standing behind her with my arm around her, over her shoulder and down in front of her chest, where she had her own hand. This happened three times. It wasn’t for very long each time, but she initiated it.

I didn’t really take any initiative myself. I just kept my arm there and didn’t try to get closer or do anything with my other hand. I’m generally quite nonchalant and rarely make the first move.

The physical contact felt quite intimate and romantic to me, but I’m unsure whether she was flirting or simply being friendly and comfortable with me.

I’m interested in hearing how others would interpret this, especially women or people who’ve experienced something similar. I don’t want to assume she’s interested, but I also don’t want to miss a potential opportunity.

Hii so i (21f) recently developed a crush on a guy (21m) i work with. I’ve worked with him for the past 3 years but two weeks ago I randomly woke up with a crush on him. My biggest problem is we come from completely different worlds. Im Pakistani and Catholic, born and raised in Canada. He’s Punjabi and Sikh, born and raised in India. He can speak English but it doesnt bring out his personality because he’s SO funny in Hindi but the problem I have is that I can’t speak Hindi but I can understand it fluently so communicating with him is a bit hard like he only speaks in English if it’s work related (and even then small sentences like what sauce is the wings). He’s a cook and I pack orders so the interactions are only me telling him what to put in the fryer and that’s really it. I can speak in Urdu (similar to Hindi) if I really want to which I think I’ll try to when I see him next. Anyways besides us never talking, we always catch eyes like if someone around me is being a bit odd or annoying my face says it all so I kinda do a side eye and then when I look at him he’s already looking at me making the same face. Even when I talk to other guys around us he’s paying attention because I’ll look over at him and he’s already side eyeing. He also has small gestures that make me fall even harder like it may sound delusional but when he’s giving me boxes of fries for an example he hands it to me in my hands instead of how the other guys just put them anywhere on the table and make me move out my way to grab them. Not just the fries part but he’ll close boxes for me, put things in bags for me, etc and I don’t notice him doing it for other people but I may not be paying attention. It’s mostly like the respect he has for everyone where he helps where he can and I appreciate that part of him. Yesterday was probably the first time I talked to him but barely. First I was talking to a guy beside him and said something funny so when I looked over he was laughing. Then I asked him his age because even tho I’ve been working with him for years I never knew it but it was a shock and his face was just so sweet smiling about how shocked I was. Anyways idk what I should do. Should I speak the language he knows more frequently so maybe it makes him talk to me more or should I ignore it because at the end of the day I doubt either of our parents would approve this relationship. Thoughts?

This guy I’m into (in a professional setting, think personal trainer), mentioned he hurt the skin on his pec while we were chatting during one of our sessions. This was relevant to something we were talking about earlier, but I didn’t expect him to pull down his shirt and show me this tiny wound on his very well-defined pec.

I can be a little thick and miss signals sometimes, but I’m not crazy and he was flirting with me, right?

What should I say?? I have nothing. The prompt is: I won’t won’t shut up about … my dog (I have 2 dogs at home for context)

So there is a girl. We are in the same class and I cant help but stare at her she gorgeous or how u spell that idk

When I loom at her she sometimes looks back at me for a moment then looks at another direction I dont wanna sound paranoid but I feel like maybe me looking at her made her think different or prob Im going crazy

Also I was looking at her and our mutual friend while they were talking and I saw her looking at me just like 2-3 seconds multiple times

As a guy who cant decide anything this is something thats on my mind for days.

And also lately at math class I said that I do t understand anything but teach thougth I was talking about the question on the board and she jumped and said

[My Name] doesn't understand anything.

Im going crazy now.

I need British Redditors to settle a cultural dispute because apparently I no longer understand what “banter” means.

I'm (34F) French, living in London. A British guy (30M) joined my team several months ago. I was initially in a more senior/lead role relative to him, and during that time everything between us was completely normal and professional. After a reorganisation, that was no longer the case.

Somewhere after that, our dynamic changed. For context, we are both in long term relationships.

He was the one who initially shifted it into a flirtatious register. He started making more suggestive/relationship-coded jokes, and I started playing along.

And then, to be completely fair to him, I really started playing along.

At this point it's absolutely mutual. I flirt back, initiate things myself and escalate plenty of it. Sometimes he starts it, sometimes I do. I enjoy the dynamic.

So this isn't “my coworker keeps hitting on me and won't stop.” He opened that door, I enthusiastically walked through it, and we've both been holding it open ever since.

But he still initiates plenty himself.

He calls me “pookie.” He asks me things like:

“Would you fancy me if I was a fish?”

We joke constantly about attraction, jealousy, dates, sex and one of us secretly being in love with the other.

We've had explicitly sexual conversations. During one already suggestive conversation, he asked whether I would sit on him naked.

I asked if I would be rejected.

His answer:

“There's only one way to find out.”

Which, yes, is funny. But also not exactly devoid of erotic subtext.

Again: context. I was actively participating in the conversation. He didn't ambush me at the coffee machine with a naked-sitting questionnaire.

Still, an ambitious contribution to the category of platonic workplace banter.

There are also recurring fake dates that he keeps initiating.

Once we were talking about meeting up to discuss work and he sent me a list of “London restaurants that are romantic AF.”

Other times he'll suggest doing something together, I'll ask whether he's actually asking me out, and the answer is essentially: obviously not, idiot, joke.

There is also a genuine friendship underneath all of this. We talk a lot, seek each other out at work, check in on each other, have coffee/lunch together and talk about our relationships and personal lives and make a lot of jokes.

And we get extremely meta about whatever this is.

I've literally told him I like having him as a friend but also enjoy our “banter flirt,” and that sometimes I enjoy the flirt part so much that it overshadows the friendship.

His contribution to this mature discussion was shortly afterwards telling me:

“Meet me in bathroom.”

Growth.

Recently he suggested we watch a work meeting together, just the two of us, and we booked a small room.

There wasn't really any practical reason we needed to watch it together. In fact, once I got there, he spent a large part of the meeting on his phone, which made me wonder why he'd specifically suggested we watch it together in the first place.

I felt like there were some charged moments — eyes-mouth-eyes eye contacts, sitting very close, legs and arms touching — but I'm putting all of that firmly in the subjective / potentially delusional column, by now I'm obviously hyper-aware of him.

During the meeting, he asked what I was doing that evening.

I said cleaning and going to the gym.

He said he was going for a beer with a friend.

I asked:

“How do you want me to react to this?”

He said something along the lines of:

“That you're happy for me, that you wish we could have a beer together…”

I said:

“Well, that's exactly what I'm saying then.”

Later, as he walked out of the room to meet his friend, he casually said:

“Love you.”

“love you” absolutely did not appear out of nowhere and could very easily have just been another instalment in the joke.

But it didn't leave me indifferent.

The next morning, obviously, I teased him about his “declaration of love.”

He informed me that he loves his cat, his mother and his girlfriend.

Fair.

But because I realised I was hoping there was something underneath, later that day I actually stopped joking and spoke to him seriously irl.

I told him that I'm not completely indifferent to our dynamic. I know I participate, I enjoy it, and I'm not blaming him for something we've mutually created. But sometimes it affects me, and I find it difficult to reconcile how the whole thing feels with how he describes it.

He was very clear:

We're friends. It's banter. You're crazy for thinking otherwise.

According to him, a significant part of the problem is cultural: I'm French, French people are grumpy, and I fundamentally don't understand British sarcasm/humour (which is sarcasm in it of istself).

This explanation does a lot of lifting.

Whenever I try to analyse the dynamic, the answer is basically some variation of:

British humour. You're overthinking it. Stop being French.

He's so adamant about how innocent it is that he says he could show our conversations to his girlfriend and she wouldn't be bothered.

And I told him:

I don't believe you.

That's the part I want Reddit to judge.

I'm not saying he's secretly in love with me.

I'm not saying he wants to cheat. I think he's casually attracted - likes the sexual tension - has no intention of acting on it - but its not innocent either.

Maybe he's completely right. Maybe I'm culturally illiterate lol.

But the mismatch between what we're actually doing and his insistence that I'm basically imagining the flirtatious dimension because I don't understand British humour makes me feel insane.

At the same time, he has now seriously told me that's how he experiences it. I'm taking “we're friends” as the answer - regardless of how he feels - but I anticipate going through this loop of banter -> going with the flow/ enjoying -> then overanalysing then hurting because I am feeling gaslit or not respected.

We are sat next to each other, see each other everyday at work. Help me navigate this weird work relationship!

I'm an older male. I just got out of my car to walk into the grocery store. Two younger women were walking passed my car to go into the store too. They appeared to be a couple, holding hands. One was very feminine and the other more butch.

The feminine lady, as she passed me looked me right in the eye and smiled (quite large) at me. I smiled back as a sign of politeness, but thought it was a very flirty smile as opposed to friendly.

They pass and go inside and I follow about 10 yards behind. They disappear briefly but a couple of minutes later run into them again, so this time I smiled at her and she returned an equally flirty smile and locked eyes with me. The other lady did not even notice me.

Is it possible this attractive young woman was flirting with me, or was this all just politeness?

he is my exes best friend.. we are good friends and i dont know if he likes me but i need some ideas to seduce him without being too straight forward yk? mostly to get back at my toxic ex. my ex hated everything i liked, my movies, sodas you name it...he would call me a basic white girl (im indian) and too westernized and never bought me a single thing but always had money to hangout with his friends. i really need help with this guys..