I (24 m) really like this girl (22 f) who is on her 3rd semester in Physics and Astronomy bachelor. I myself am on 5th semester in the same field, and my 3rd and 4th semesters were extremely rough.
Our entire story goes something like this:
There is an Astronomy event every month that we hold together with a team. It's me, the girl I like (let's call her Mandy), and three other girls and a guy. Mandy and I clicked very quickly and I have since I met her liked being around her. I don't often click instantly with people, and I can quite easily be wooed by girls who seem nice around me.
A few weeks later, we are in our Uni bar, talking, and I notice that she's being very nice and touchy with everyone (guys and girls), and she even mentions that she feels like she's in her "slut phase" (pardon the profanity). I quite quickly lost the spark she had instilled in me because of that comment. I still thought she was cute, and she was definitely still nice, but I could easily live with her being just a friend. That same day, she mentioned to me that she had written a story that got published (I, too, am an aspiring writer, so this caught my interest). But she never told me anything about the story, or its title. I didn't ask, either.
Summer break comes to a close, and I meet her for another bar chat where we now talk about very personal issues. Over the summer she had gotten a boyfriend, who she was having trouble with now, and she was dealing with other issues, too, which I've promised her to keep to myself. A week later, I talk to her again, and she's broken up with the guy, and we talk about the hardship of dating. I seem to regain the spark I had, because the way she talks about how she liked that guy, it seems like she wants something serious. During that talk, she also mentions that she thinks I'm a sweet guy. I, of course, am very moved by this.
Now, she also mentions some struggles with her 3rd semester. The same struggles I recall having. So I help her out loads. I give her non-syllabus books that helped me through the courses, I give her formula books and mind-maps, all to make her semester easier. This is mainly because I'd hate anyone to suffer the same mental catastrophe that was my 3rd and 4th semesters, but also I'm paying her quite a bit more attention than others.
Since, I am getting very interested in her again, I remember the story she wrote. I do a lot of online digging and eventually find and contact the publisher and ask for a copy. I get the copy, read it and bring it for next bar meeting (last friday) where I surprise her with it. She turns red immediately, and hides her face, laughing. We hadn't talked about that story since that one time, which by now is half-a-year ago. She can't believe it, and wants to hear the story of how I got it. She seems to be very appreciative.
During the weekend, I couldn't stop thinking about her and how I'd love to ask her out. I know she's on hinge (I don't use it, but someone I know told me they saw her on it), so she still seemed to be looking to date. All I had to do was find something to do just the two of us (and we share many interests, so it shouldn't be that difficult).
Just today, I met her in the hall. She seemed busy at the time, so I walked on, but then she asks if I wanted to talk to her. I just ask how everything went after I left last friday, and I point out a hickey on her neck. She laughs and tells me things went a bit overboard. The guy that left her the hickey apparently wasn't "boyfriend material" and she now also mentions that she thinks "Maybe I shouldn't have a boyfriend at the moment" because of the Uni stress on the side. This kinda crushed me... Not so much the guy she went out with, but more so the fact that she thinks she might not want to date anyone.
I'm fairly certain that she doesn't know about my feelings, although maybe she suspects something (idk, I am horrible at picking up cues). Part of me still really wants to pick up the courage to ask her out, but another part of me is scared that things will be incredibly awkward between us. At least now we are very good friends.
What do you think? Should I still try? Is there a possibility she might change her mind? What would you do in my place?