Wife is due soon. Has anyone cranked out a few sets of push ups for a quick pump while wife is pushing? Don't want my future child to see the photos one day and think dad isn't shredded

I got home from work tonight, after a 4 day weekend solo with our 20 month old twins and 3.5 year old, I decided the best solution to a cold and rainy day was to phone in dinner and made some fries and nuggets with cucumbers and berries.

My wife works shifts so she won't be home until 2345 or so.

While cleaning up from dinner, my youngest son left a half nugget on his plate, which I obviously chucked in my mouth on the way to the sink.

I hadn't planned on tripping over a Lamborghini Gallardo hot wheels and thoroughly lodging that chicken nugget bite into the back of my throat.

I cough a bit, attempt to catch my breath. Nothing. Stuck. Blocked. Start coughing with the little bit of air remaining in my crappy, asthmatic lungs.

A little comes up. I try to breathe again. A whisper of air gets through my trachea.

I turn and look at all 3 kids still sitting and laughing at the table, all I can imagine is what their reaction will be to my limp body on the ground for hours before their mother will get home, let alone the fact that I'll have been done in by a half eaten chicken nugget...

As I'm violently coughing over the sink, I'm looking through our kitchen window for signs of life in my neighbors houses across the four way intersection. No, I won't make it there in time.

I pull out my phone and hit the power button frantically to enable the emergency alert.

At this point I'm barely able to cough. The beige breaded chicken is fully lodged in my airway. I look at my kitchen counter and throw my chest full bore against it.

I feel movement, a small gap, some oxygen makes it to my lungs.

I go again, even harder this time.

By now the kids are quiet, my eldest son is asking me what's wrong, why I'm vomiting in the sink?

The last counter blow finally moves the obstruction, I can take a breath. More coughing, more spitting out pieces of a meal that should have been discarded.

I can breathe again. I explain to the 911 operator that I'm ok, she insists on sending out an ambulance, no I'm fine now, sorry for calling.

Call the wife, Android sent a text when I used the emergency alert, she can hear it in my voice I'm not well.

No it's passed now, just a scare.

Take a breath, sit down, drink some water, kiss the kids.

Bath time everyone, let's go.

Lads, I have just watched the Sleepytime episode with my 2 year old and it made me cry. Toddler wanted to watch it 9 more times and it made me choke everytime. This show genuinely deserves awards

Not sure if this is a common trick for anyone else's kids but with my 2 year old if it's time to end something (ie leave the playground, turn off Thomas the Tank Engine, put toys away for naptime), they will often throw an absolute fit, but if I get them to say bye bye or goodnight to the thing its like their brain just flips and suddenly they are good to let it go. It's literally a flip from absolute screaming tantrum to "ok lets go". Anyone else find good toddler cheat codes?

Looking for some new routines to try besides my typical yogurt and handful of pumpkin seeds.

Thanks in advance

Everyday is a gift with this Lil girl

Slow down, take baby steps, throw the rocks in the pond.. Let them get there feet dirty...

One day you'll miss the little things

My son went got life flighted to a bigger hospital 200 miles away, and hes been here for a week and to make a long story short he was on the ventilator for 2 days they took him off and by the end of that 3rd day he had to be put back on and its been a battle since he got here, he does better then he doesn't, back to square one, hes not on the ventilator atm they took that out this morning but hes back on high oxygen cause hes having a hard time getting oxygen through him, his heart rate is good they just think he needs more of it, truth be told I got excited cause I thought my boy was getting better and right now im just sitting next to him as he fedgets cause hes uncomfortable. I cant stand seeing him like this, I hsvent moved from his side, im scared for him, im scared for my wife, im scared of the bills that are getting ready to pile up i already drained what savings we did have already ran outta pto I did have im running in nothing and everytime a doctor tells me hes doing better he just starters, idk not feeling ok. And its making me just lose it, cant stay calm im barely able to keep it together I havent left this room outside of going to the bathroom since last week and idk what to do anymore.

Dads, I really like the fact that we use cloth diapers! But I can’t say that I can recommend it to just anyone. There’s a bunch of tradeoffs that don’t quite line up into a surefire argument in their favor. Perhaps because of that, I felt like writing down our experience in case it helped anyone thinking about this.

We subscribe to a local cloth diaper service that delivers cloth diapers to us and takes the dirties away for industrial-strength cleaning every week. We buy and keep diaper covers and rubber diaper clips, which are also necessary components to using cloth diapers. The dirties go in a large water proof lined bag that sits in a large bin.

We have two kids: a 2.5 year old boy and a 3+ week old girl. We used cloth diapers with our eldest since he was born and until he was potty trained. We like to use disposable diapers at night since they can absorb ridiculous amounts of liquid and therefore help night sleep last longer.

Here are some pros and cons:

CONS

- Cloth takes up a lot more mass and volume. It makes the diaper bag heavier and more crowded. We use smaller waterproof lined bags (reusable and washable) for holding dirties when out and about). Your kid’s butt may have trouble fitting into pants that are technically their size.

- It takes skill and practice to fold cloth diapers well. There are many different folding techniques you can try, but the jelly roll (pictured above) is the best at keeping the contents in, IMO.

- The environmental impact is not as nice as you might think. Yes, you reduce landfill usage by not having so many disposables, but you also increase water usage for laundry and emissions through the weekly deliveries.

PROS

- Blowouts are rarer and more contained. The diaper folding technique is one line of defense against blowouts, and then there’s the diaper cover too. It’s simply a stronger defense than paper diapers. Sometimes we even use the diaper covers on the paper diapers during night sleep, just in case.

- These cloth pieces are versatile. You can use them as a little towel to keep the changing table clean during a more involved diaper change. You can use them to wipe the kids down during big messes. There’s a tangibility that feels more satisfying to use compared to paper diapers.

- I like how our trash output for our home is remarkably low for having babies. We do use disposable wet paper wipes, but at home we predominantly use little fabric wipes. We have spray bottles with a lightly soaped water solution that we use to get these wipes wet when needed, and we do laundry to clean them alongside any diaper covers that are due to be cleaned (pro tip: get a spray bottle with just water in it to squirt on poopy butts to minimize risk of diaper rash, especially after diarrhea).

- This is both a pro and a con, but the baby will often feel the discomfort of a soiled diaper more with cloth than with paper. The downside is that you may have to do more diaper changes than you want. But perhaps that’s ultimately better for the baby’s skin? One common concern with paper diapers is whether baby is getting exposed to strange chemicals on the diapers. I’m not too worried about that myself, but I do appreciate the simplicity of knowing it’s just a simple piece of cloth and nothing too chemically fancy going on.

- The biggest plus is potty training. Because the kiddo is so much more aware of their body while wearing cloth diapers, our eldest became daytime potty trained before his second birthday. Potty training clicked for him right away, and people keep telling me that boys are notoriously difficult to potty train. We still have him in disposable pull-ups for night sleep and day naps, but this relatively infrequent use of diapers is really nice.

I’ve met a number of parents in my area who have tried cloth diapering but as far as I know, we’re the only ones who stuck with it all the way to potty training. One family said they stopped liking it once the kid started getting bigger and the diapers became huge pieces of cloth as a result. Another family said they stopped because they basically shrugged and asked “why are we going through all this hassle?”

And I dunno if I have a good rebuttal to that other than to say that we really liked it and had a good experience with it. Ultimately there’s a part of my brain that thinks cloth is just so cool and real while paper diapers feel so alien and weird. Like a freak, I was genuinely looking forward to using cloth diapers again with my youngest when she was born.

All credit goes to my wife for bringing up the idea of cloth diapers in the first place and figuring out how we were going to make it all work.

So a cheap, easy, fast, and tasty meal for any night!! All you need is tortillas, a cookie cutter, one plain rotisserie chicken, a little bit of oil, your choice of taco seasoning and toppings! It cost around 15 bucks total and fed my family of five with leftovers. Made mini tacos for the kiddos and regular size for us adults. I also decided to make chalupa shells like Taco Bell and they were excellent!!

Dads - be proactive, go get yourself checked - now that that’s out of the way.

Those of you that have had it done, what’s the after procedure recovery like? I ask because my group of dad friends decided to revive our annual golf trip after 8 years and it happens to start the day of my procedure.

My procedure is at 7:00am. When could I reasonably expect to be able to drive 90 minutes then play 18?

We talking 3-4 hours or should I wait a whole day?

I coach my 6 year old's tee ball, basketball, and flag football teams. I try to make sure everyone gets a chance to play and the kids have fun. Other coaches on other teams are mostly fine but some are just awful. This last weekend we had a flag football game and the coaches are living through the kids. One coach jumped into the play and forced the QB to hand it off to one of the players. And all they do is have the best kid get the ball while everyone else just watches. How is that even fun?

Ok, rant over. It's been bothering me for a few days now.

I'm a dad of two boys, ages 10 and 8, and I'm looking for some parenting advice about something that happened yesterday. I'm struggling with whether I handled it properly.

My sons and their 9-year-old cousin were playing in our backyard pool. Our families are extremely close, and the boys have grown up together. My brother-in-law and I were supervising.

As the boys have gotten older, their play has become increasingly physical, with more roughhousing and occasional fighting.

Yesterday was no exception... The two younger boys were teaming up on my oldest, and things were escalating. We repeatedly told them to stop and warned them they'd have to leave the pool if they continued.

At one point, my oldest jumped onto a padded pool raft that my nephew was on in retaliation. I didn't see it happen because I was briefly looking at my phone, but my brother-in-law absolutely lost it.

He screamed at my son extremely aggressively, at the top of his lungs, "GET OUT OF THE F*CKING POOL RIGHT NOW! I F*CKING SAW THAT! GET THE F*CK OUT!"

I was shocked by the intensity of his reaction and immediately said, "Hey man, chill out."

My son was visibly upset. He got out of the pool and eventually ran upstairs to his room.

My brother-in-law insisted my son had deliberately tried to hurt his cousin. We reviewed footage from our backyard security camera, which showed what I suspected: roughhousing that had gotten out of hand, but nothing suggesting malicious intent.

I went upstairs to check on my son and told him his uncle was completely out of line and should never have spoken to him that way.

I then confronted my brother-in-law and told him he needed to apologize. He eventually did later that evening, although the apology felt somewhat halfhearted. My son accepted it, apologized for his own behaviour, and they seemed to move on.

But I couldn't shake what happened.

I called my brother-in-law later that night and told him that while I appreciated the apology, his behaviour was unacceptable and could never happen again. I explained that I would never scream and swear at his 9-year-old son like that.

His response was essentially, "Go nuts, you can yell at my kid like that if you want."

I told him that wasn't the point. I would never speak to any child that way.

This morning, my sister-in-law called me crying, apologizing for her husband's behaviour. She agreed he was completely out of line and said she'd confronted him about it as well.

Here's what I'm struggling with as a father.

I feel like I failed my son in the moment.

Instead of simply saying firmly, "Hey man, chill out," I wish I'd been much more assertive. Something like, "STOP. Do not speak to my son that way. I'll handle this."

There's also something that really bothers me about another adult screaming at my child and ordering him out of my pool, in my own home, while I'm standing right there.

I feel like I should have stepped in more firmly and taken control of the situation. Not aggressively, but decisively enough that my son knew his dad had his back.

I did defend him afterward. I checked on him, insisted on an apology, and confronted his uncle again that evening. I also told my son about that conversation and reassured him that what happened was unacceptable.

My son seems completely fine now. He's acting normally, doesn't seem upset with me, and appears to have moved on.

But I haven't.

My question for other parents:

Should I pull my son aside again today and acknowledge that I wish I'd handled the situation more firmly? Tell him that I could have done better in the moment, but that I'll always have his back?

Or am I overthinking this and potentially making something bigger out of an incident he's already moved past?

I'm struggling with the feeling that I missed an opportunity to show my son what it looks like to stand up for him when another adult crosses a line.

I'd really appreciate some perspective from other parents.

Sore throat, stuffy nose, coughing. It only took 1 month (canada)

Okay, my boy is almost 5, and I’m over watching the same couple of Disney Movies on Movie night. I can only watch Moana so many times. I somehow convinced him to watch Flubber, with Robin Williams last night, and the scene with the Flubber taking out the bad guys, I’m pretty sure might have made hi lm laugh harder than he ever has in his life.

I know he also likes Home Alone 1&2, mostly because he’ll do the Joe Pesci muttering thing occasionally when he is trying to wrestle me…. So, I’m looking for some other appropriate, slapstick movies that I can get him to watch. I tried to get him to watch a classic Three Stooges episode, and I think the Black and White made it a bridge too far.

So what else am I missing?

My daycare that we recently switched to as of September has been using Brightwheel, an app that lets you message the teachers directly at any time, allows them to ask you questions, and also has the teachers input when your child uses the bathroom, eats, naps, etc all throughout the day. The previous daycare we were at for 1 years also had a similar app, so we've grown used to this.

Today we received a message saying they are no longer using the system and are moving to a billing only system that has no communication or updates, and now the best they will do is communication via email and if you want they will write on paper the meals and poos and naps for your child.

Personally, I find this unacceptable unless they choose to reduce our daily cost. Our service level is dropping to no-communication now, the daycare will no longer be paying for that app and will be getting paid the same amount from their customers. I feel very angry about this change but am I overreacting to this? Does anyone find this type of system pointless or unnecessary?

Edit: I should note my daughter is 22 months old, so the potty notifications are really about diaper changes.

I don't know if any other dads are dealing/have dealt with a motion sick kid but it's a uniquely terrible experience. You feel bad that they feel sick and don't understand the why, it makes a mess that's difficult to clean up (both kid and car seat), and you start to feel less inclined to take them places which can be both isolating and inconvenient (and those experiencing this know the anxiety caused from hearing a cough that you know will shortly lead to them throwing up).

We tried everything from fresh air to turning around their car seat as soon as legally permitted, blasting the AC, keeping them focused on a video, etc. I have always been a bit prone to motion sickness so I tried to do some of the things that help me. We saw some improvement but driving past 15 minutes was always a gamble.

Once they were old enough, our pediatrician said we could give them children's Dramamine which definitely helped but left our kid dazed and out of it so we only used that during especially long or important trips.

We tried regular bibs and smocks but by far the best thing we've found that we're still using today is the Chundee Bib (in combination AC and focusing on a single point (like a video or something). It seems a little big at first but ours quickly got used to it and seems to understand that wearing it is a better option than having to get cleaned up and feeling gross. It's easy to rinse out with a bottle of water and has a "splash lip" on the inside that prevents what's in the bib from coming back out.

The only real downside is that it's usually around $40 but it's paid for itself in "saves" and peace of mind. Also for any dads currently going through this, it does get better. As my child has grown, the frequency has reduced and the drives have become more carefree. Best of luck!

School has a million allergy restrictions. Kids are very bored of turkey sandwiches, leftover pasta and chicken nuggets. What are you sending your kids to school with for their main protein in their lunch box?

No matter how much I try to lock things up, certainly no matter how much I explain to leave stuff alone that isn't theirs. Every day we find something broken, damaged, scratched, etc. And it's never when it happens, it's usually while they are at school that one of us stumbles onto something. Often it's days later.

How much are you experiencing this, and how are you handling it? I'm so tired of our first interaction when I'm home from work is "we need to talk about X" and being upset. I'm certain they think all we ever do is fuss. And I try so hard not to do that but it's just impossible. Yes, they have ADHD, they also aren't great at following any rules whatsoever.

Are we really turning a house into a prison? With locks on literally every door, drawer, closet, etc?

I've tried being mad, they just stare with blank eyes.

I've tried calmly talking through it, they just say "i dont know" to everything we say.

I've tried locks, to the greatest extent possible.

I've tried hiding things but they snoop, even in places I've scolded, fussed, begged, pleaded, punished them to stay away from.

I've tried giving them their own versions of things whenever possible.

I've tried punishing. I mean there's no natural consequence for "they broke my pliers in half". Make them pay for it? Ok, they burn through all their money in like 2 days and then keep breaking stuff, theyd have $2k in debt in no time. And that's not really a joke. They're 11.

And I MIGHT could handle this ok on my own, but it drives my wife literally to anger/depression/anxiety/all those things.

first time asking for advice on here

daughter is 2.5 yo, and is throwing massive fits at bed time because she wants to watch tv.

about 2 months ago bedtime became an absolute nightmare, my daughter just refused to sleep. the whole routine started taking up to 45 minutes to an hour longer than it ever had before (i know there are parents who deal with these sorts of things differently, but an extra hour at bedtime was a no go for us) partner and i started playing ambient background videos on a small tv set up in her room (forest sounds, shit like that), and it worked like a charm. no more tantrums or crying and she would pass right out.

i understand now how terrible of an idea this was, it was a temporary solution to a problem that is now exponentially worse. the backgrounds are no longer good enough and she is now demanding to watch adams family, peewees playhouse, etc.

she has no personal screens like an ipad, i keep the tv off for a majority of the day. she watches an episode of something she likes in the morning when i make her breakfast. i figure on some level she is pissed that she doesnt get to watch her shows enough.

these are the worst fits i have ever seen from her. am i fucking her up by just completley removing the tv all together at this point?

in spite of the fact that posting to the internet about parenting feels like inviting people to shit on me and my partner, i am legitimately looking for honest advice from others whove dealt with similair situations.

Got the little one tonight for a few latenight hours so she can sleep a little elevated, couldn't listen to her struggling to breath on the monitor, so have her sleeping on me and she's doing much better.

Just thinking about hot good it feels to be able to help her fight this sickness and how grateful I am for her.

Just wanted to open the floor for anyone else currently doing late night duty alternating between Tylenol and Motrin to check in and share their story, definitely a thread to vent or seek support or guidance, medical questions as always should be directed to a medical provider.

Just caught my (Chinese) MIL trying to teach my 2yo the victory sign...

...in a way us Brits would recognise as a 'two fingered salute'.

She was mortified when I said that was a rather rude gesture. Thankfully I caught them before the 2yo figured it out.

What last minute saves have you made recently?

Listen this is going to sound like the most ungrateful spoiled rotten shit; but hear me out. Also sorry if this isn’t a good sub for this, just didn’t know where else to go.

Baby was born in march, and it’s been a financial punch in the teeth. And, the last 2 months we’ve had several problems pop up in our house. First, our electric bill went up over 100$ this month, which just sucks. 2. A few weeks ago we had a circuit breaker explode, which cost 700$ to get all of the symptoms and causes that led to it happening. Then we started noticing water damage on our kitchen ceiling. It got worse, so we called a plumber out, he said it was the overflow gasket. I took it out, replaced it, etc.

Few days later, giving the little man a bath, and the wife sees water dripping out of the ceiling. So this leads to us obviously freaking out a little bit, because it’s definitely a bigger issue than originally expected and is probably going to cost a lot of money.

Now, my in laws are rich. Filthy fucking rich. Like offered to buy our 350k house in cash kinda rich. However, they are conniving, and manipulating individuals. We ultimately decided we would never accept money from them because they would hang it over our heads, and feel it would give them some level of authority in how it was used.

So, my wife (who i am not upset at in this situation, she was just venting to her mom, totally understandable) calls her mom, tells her what happened. Her dad, without consulting me at all, sends a plumber to my house, and pays him to fix the leak. Which I am grateful for. And they refuse to tell me how much it costs so I can pay them back.

However, I feel as though this is i guess a boundary that was crossed? Like this is my house, I want to know what’s going on in it, who’s working on things in it, and I especially want to know if there is a man in the house who I don’t know with my wife and child while I’m at work. And I don’t want to be in debt to my in laws.

Am I overreacting? If i’m just being an insufferable dick please tell me and i’ll go pound sand but i’m decently pissed about it. Like grateful obviously, but still peeved.

This community has become one of my favorites on reddit, which is why I’m sharing this here.

(used AI only to summarize, because it was even bigger... sorry)

Wife and I are in our late 30s, with two kids (6 and 2). My wife is a stay-at-home mom, and we both take care of the youngest, who until last month was a really bad sleeper. Our life is “great” by society’s standards: great income, stable job, I love my family and want the kids to thrive. But I’m sad and tired every day.

I found out what I’m feeling can be called “anhedonia”. I stay in bed as long as I can, until the latest I can get up to take my kid to school. I exercise a few days a week, not much, and I’m sad every other day without knowing why. I did 4 sessions of therapy, and the tests say I’m depressed (without anxiety).

It seems to have started, or grown to this size, after our house renovation (double the time, triple the effort we expected) and moving to a new city closer to my relatives. A few items on the house are still unfinished. I know every one of them, but I get stuck when I try to do them, and after problems with almost all the contractors, I don’t trust anyone to call for help. My therapist basically said “just do the list” and it’d make me feel better. That made me freeze and doubt his approach. I’m not doing the list precisely because of the depression.

Then the guilt kicks in: I work remote in IT and keep “switching tabs” to social media, which makes me feel worse, but my body can’t seem to stay put without going there (hi, reddit). And also to house chores to help the wife.

It’s been a long, rainy El Niño winter here in South America, so I don’t know if that’s related. I started supplementing vitamin D a couple of weeks ago. My wife doesn’t think it’s just the renovation and the move, and I partly agree, since I wasn’t great even before. I also felt she was depressed too, so I took on a lot of kid and house tasks, which adds to my guilt at work, though she’s been feeling much better for a few months now.

I’ve tried hobbies like amateur photography and a homelab with Home Assistant, but they come and go, and I end up stealing work time for them because I have no other time. I play an hour of Zelda once a month. I love being with the kids on weekends, but then the weekend ends, nothing got done on the house, and I feel down again.

I guess I'm not even sure what I'm asking. Maybe I just needed to put this somewhere, or hear from people who've been through something similar. But if you feel something similar, how did you overcome? What did you do?

Thanks folks!

Title I guess.

My 3 years old daughter just refuses to poop. She will hold until she poops her pants at daycare or will ask for a diaper at home. She can go almost a whole week without pooping.

We went to the GP, they prescribed macrogol (laxative) which we give her but I'm getting really worried. She is fully ok with peeing in the toilet.

I'm at a loss...

My wife and I just had a baby girl; she’s 2.5 months old. Absolute joy in both our lives. My wife has her birthday next week and I’m struggling to figure out what to get her. Let me share why I’m struggling. Out baby doesn’t like me much right now, she’s struggling to feel comforted by me (this will change as she ages, not a concern of mine) the issue is my wife is her comfort person and she only lasts about 30mins before she becomes inconsolable by me. (Not short of trying almost everything). This makes it hard for date night or spending time together which is her favorite thing. I’m struggling in the gift department too, she likes jewelry but we’re not going anywhere for her to wear it and I just got her some as a push present. Just feel a little aimless on what to do.

She’s been stressed with the baby since she’s sort of exhausted taking care of her and finding a babysitter isn’t possible right now. Any good advice for her birthday or presents would be appreciated :)

Happy to answer on any questions you may have