1 year anniversary of her passing

[u/164dog]

I’m not sure what to expect. The kids and I plan to get together.

Anything surprise you at the 1 year anniversary?

[u/cmatbmed]

For me the anticipation of the day is always worse than the day itself.

[u/Some-Tear3499 → u/cmatbmed]

This. The day itself was just another day. The anticipation and the anxiety was far worse.

Yes the I jokingly expected to receive some kind of certificate that read….

Congratulations! We have successfully completed Grief 101. The First Year After The Death Of Your Spouse.

Or that somehow finishing that first year would somehow make it better or easier.
The second yr has taught me that checking all the little boxes about how to survive this loss doesn’t make the grief go away. It did enable me to reengage with the world and other people. It showed me that there is no magic wand, magic formula, no nothing that is going to spare me from the grief.

It is something that is the result of a major life altering loss. That I must go through the grieving, and realize there is no other side. It is simply a part of who I am now.

It has gotten easier to live with. I have had improvements in my well being, in my live. It has gotten easier to carry.

[u/Rollie17]

Nothing surprised me. I replayed everything that happened leading up to his death. I know realistically there was no stopping him from shooting himself but my mind still tried to find every way I could have stopped it from happening.

Family and friends reached out. No one reached out the second year. I don’t expect anyone to reach out on the 3rd anniversary in January.

[u/naked_nomad]

Hers will be the 28th.

[u/LaSenoraPerez]

Coming up on it, November 1st will be one year.

[u/Wingless-]

I suffered so much about the first anniversary before it arrived that on the day............. I had nothing left.

It was just another miserable day.

[u/Ordinary_Novel_476]

The day after is very hard. Try and do something comforting that day.