Extreme Nofap withdrawals

Appreciate the invite to this sub, i've been trying to find resources/recovery stories to make sense of this problem for a while now, i've been hooked on porn and masturbation since i was young. I have sexual performance issues since i lost my virginity at 18.

Its been a tough journey with this stuff because of the lack of information on this topic and from what i've read and seen on other subreddits, this seems to effect people differently based on just how your made up, your level of use and even how you use porn effects you differently.

For me personally, it can make it difficult for me to keep an erection and reach an orgasm. When i first started becoming aware of porn addiction and the side affects of it i thought i had death grip with a mix of being hooked on novelty(i could jump all around and find different types to watch or talk to girls online) As someone who has ADHD its hard to get away from that as our brains our wired to move on to the next thing very quickly.

I think for me my goal is to find other habits of self soothing as i use it more when i'm stressed or feel lost. I've been trying to identify the issue behind my abuse of porn to better understand what i need to do to quit. I have had some success as i've pulled away more, i am no longer super anxious during sex, i've learned to not panic when my issues pop up and pull through but the issues are still present and i struggle to not always check my erection through the act. Porn is still something i have to fight not to watch and lately i've been falling back into it as life has gotten more stressful. The good news is i am able to keep an erection longer and i have finished during intercourse for the first time a couple months ago and have continued to a decent amount of times.

My question for people that have recovered is, what do i do to remove this habit from my life and what can i do during the process to not white knuckle through it?

Also since i've gotten my post removed multiple times for talking about quitting masturbation, i am NOT saying forever but it is something i feel the need to pull back from for a bit to allow my body to heal.

I've tried porn blockers but Ive unconsciously turned them off. I've tried forcing my self to delete stashs of porn but I can't. I've tried stoping but it's gotten to the point where I get hard just look at a girl best friend in school and it's sicking and disgusting. Idk what to do and I can't talk about this to anyone else who isn't in my personal life or then it's going to get weird...

There's the version of me people know, reliable and decent, and then there's 1am me who does things that version would be horrified by. Closing the gap between them has been the real work. Does that split feel familiar to you?

I think I started masturbation at the age of five or something without having any idea what it is. I used to rubbed my vagina through my clothes back then and even now that's the furthest I went, rubbing my vagina. I never actually inserted my fingers in my vagina. back then it felt good and I just did it. Me and my sister used to watch kissing scenes or mild sex scenes without nudity and I used to rub my vagina through clothes and she used to rub against the bed while watching those videos back when we were young, without the knowledge of our parents and It went on like that till I was 10-11. My parents actually caught me rubbing few times and thrashed me since then I started being careful and as I was growing up I was a separate room. During that time COVID started so I had more internet access by staying all day along in the house. This when I found hentai anime. I used to watch like kind of hentai anime by myself for some time and I realized it felt weird doing that again with my sister watching me and my sister felt the same so we decided to give each other privacy whenever we wanna do it. So I went on watching those Hentai anime and there were animes where they fucked their own mother, father and siblings. It felt disgusting when I discovered them and because of that I started to find a few things my father did to me weird even though it was completely normal. That's when I realised porn ruined my mind. Now I find everything sexual even when it is not supposed to me. Sometimes I even think sexual things about small kids and I genuinely feel disgusted by myself. Later I got addicted to actual porn too. I also watch gay and lesbian porn. So everything I see feels lowkey sexual but I never do anything sexual except rubbing myself. I don't even wanna do that and I want these disgusting thoughts out of my head. Getting sexual thoughts but one or two people u like is fine but like those thoughts on most random people I think that's messed up so yeah please help me. I don't know how to get out of this. Will I get better if I stop watching porn? Can I get tips in how to quit?

i have a huge porn addiction, bigger than a lot of people think, any access i can get is when i use it, it got bad enough to the point where i got arrested for it for.....well i dont share this like at all....but i got put in juvie for child porn, ive been in and out of treatment facilities since i was eleven, for various reasons.....i used to live in a juvenile grouphome, but i had to leave when i turned 19, so now i live in an adult grouphome. i have no money, no family that lives near me, (doesnt mean i dont talk to them, i just dont ever see them), my addiction has actually cost me my job before. before you ask, i dont have any felony charges or charges in general, and no im not a registered offender, nor am i required to be one, im not on probation, im technically a "free" man, but my county still has guardianship, which is why i havent moved to missouri to live with my mom. i am in therapy for all of this, i only view regular porn now (well, mostly stepsibling adult stuff) but i need help. its also partly why i cant find a girlfriend bc i cant find someone to support and guide me😞😞

I saw my penis contracting like hard flaccid. And decrease in size. Is it good sign or bad . Have anyone faced similar

Not looking for confessions, just curious how much of the weight is the act versus the hiding. For me the fear of discovery ate more of my life than the habit did. What's the fear that sits heaviest for you?

"Day 2 (11-10-2026) of no porn: Done.''

I posted this in another thread and a mod pointed me to this thread, hope this doesn't count as spam it wasn't my intention.

I need help quitting. I've tried the discords, the chatrooms, the forums. Nothing helps. Is there any online zoom/teams/google meet style porn addiction AA groups? I'm looking for actual real people and support to help each other and hold each-other accountable.

Porn has literally ruined my life. User for almost 19 years. DMs open. Pen pals, long term friends to help each-other and talk about it. Anything. I need a way out.

I'm not from the US so physical presence is obviously a no no.

On Sunday last week I had my last PMO session and I haven't had quite a streak since 2 years ago. Being married and in a healthy relationship helps stop the urges from getting to me, since it was never about me seeing these women in porn better looking/performing than my wife but it was just something to relax me when she's not around.

I'm not saying that you can only quit when you're married. I don't spend a lot of time with my wife because we still haven't moved in together, and I'm keeping my mind off of it by spending more time outside shopping for our apartment, or playing video games at home till I'm out of energy/time to do anything other than sleep right away.

"Day 1 (10-10-2026) of no porn: Done. I forgot to post yesterday."

I go back and forth. Some days calling it addiction makes it make sense, other days it feels like handing over responsibility. I've landed on using it privately and not building an identity out of it. Where do you sit on the word?

Three people know for me. My brother, a therapist, and a friend I told at 2am who never mentioned it again, which honestly was the right response. How many people in your life know, and did telling anyone change things?

like i have been addict since 14 year old i am 20 now i have a girlfriend i have reduce a little bit like 8 month ago but since 2 week i watch all week like i watch it all day and 3-4x per day so i wonder if i can cause me to have less desire to initiate sex with my girlfriend or enjoy it because i love her so much she so beautifull etc but we have sex i can feel detached or like not here in the moment and have no desire to continu even if i am attract to her and love her :(

so does porn can cause to be have less libido or less be interest for sex etc