r/Millennials • u/rageagainstmymachin • 9h ago
Discussion Fellow millennials: does tipping culture make you not even want to buy a F-N coffee anymore?
I’m 37, born in 1989. Growing up, my understanding was that you tipped at restaurants where somebody came to your table and served you. The way I was raised, 10% was normal, 15% was generous, and 20% meant excellent service. That’s what I grew up with, before anyone turns this into an argument about restaurant percentages.
Outside of that, tips were mostly optional. Tow truck driver helps me late at night on a difficult job? Here’s an extra $20. Repairman goes above and beyond? Maybe $40 or $50. Something you chose to do because you appreciated somebody.
Now I can’t even order a coffee without feeling like I’m having a fucking moral dilemma.
Dutch Bros is the worst about this in my experience. They take your order, hold out the tablet, look you dead in the eye, and ask, “Would you like to leave a tip?”
Bro. You just took my order. I haven’t even gotten the coffee yet.
Sometimes I’m going straight to the window, so nobody even came out to my car. Same question. I say no, and now I’m sitting there waiting for my drink in this awkward silence, feeling guilty over something that’s supposedly optional.
It’s not that I’m broke. It’s not that I can’t afford an extra dollar or two. I just don’t like being put on the spot every time I buy something. Having the money doesn’t mean I want every transaction to come with a guilt trip.
Starbucks feels a little less awkward, especially when I order through the app. Scan, get my drink, move on. But at the window, that tip screen still gets put right in front of you. One dollar, two dollars, three dollars… dude, I just wanted a coffee. How did this become another decision I have to justify to myself?
And my frustration is mostly with the corporations setting this up. Why make employees ask customers directly? Why create this uncomfortable interaction between the person buying a drink and the person making it? It feels like these companies want customers to take responsibility for making sure their workers get paid enough.
Pay your people properly. If I want to leave something extra, let it actually be extra.
Maybe nobody behind the counter gives a shit when I hit “no tip.” Maybe some of that awkwardness is in my own head. But the way the question gets asked absolutely makes it feel like there’s a right answer, and “no” isn’t it.
Yes, this is a first-world problem. I know. But it’s getting to the point where I’d rather skip going altogether than deal with it.
I just want a motherfucking coffee.
Are other millennials feeling this? Where do you draw the line between something you’re happy to tip for and being asked to tip just because you bought something?
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u/xEllimistx 9h ago
Dude....fucking Cici's of all places asks for tips now.
Cici's.
Arguably the worst, cheap buffet pizza you can buy. Like....if this was Night City, Buck a Slice is probably better quality.
It's insane.
I'm literally doing all the work here. I'm filling my own plate and drink, walking to and from the buffet. I don't even get the special ordered pizza. I just get what's available at the buffet.