I get it. Life is hard, I have a shitfuck of mental disorders and disabilities that prevent me from living life to the fullest too. But I dont go around asking strangers for advce then having a whole gun of excuses and illnesses to why I cant accept the advce. It makes you sound so fucking ungrateful towards people who are trying to help you. Dont be surprised if people dont want to help you anymore because of it.

"I struggle with cleaning"

"I do too. What helps me is doing cleaning in chunks-"

"Oh, i cant do that. If i try doing it in chunks i just end up not doing it at all"

"Okay. Maybe you can try this method here- I heard it works for a lot of pe-"

"Oh, I cant do that too lol. I have a condition called xyxyx so it makes me physically unable to exercise discipline whatsoever."

"Okay.. maybe you can tr-"

"Nope cant do that"

Keep it to a therapist. Please.

In every single movie adaptation of Carrie to date, she's been skinny, blonde, and "normal" looking.

That does the plot a huge disservice, ​because unfortunately the kids are mean to her because of her appearance, and she is looked down on for it. Her winning prom queen at the end is supposed to be a gag, like "lets choose the ugly fat girl". It doesnt make sense when you see the average blonde girl up there, then there is no irony. She is supposed to be overweight, pimply, wears hand me down clothing and is deeply uncomfortable in her own skin.

I am against bullying, but if she was portrayed biblically accurate to the book, I feel like even more people would sympathize with her when she does unleash on them.​

​

Like I said when I was 18 I got stabbed, it was in my arm and now I have nerve damage. My arm isn’t completely unusable, I can still move it and pick up stuff but I can’t do stuff like write or hold something still. And ever since then i haven’t been able to use knives, it’s gotten better but i still can’t cut meat because it reminds me of it. Because of the nerve damage like half my hand is numb, it was the very first thing i noticed when i got stabbed and it never came back. It used to hurt a lot, it luckily stopped in my hand but i still get random pains in my forearm where i got stabbed. I regret that day so much, I should’ve been more careful.

Idk if this is like super shallow of me or something but if in like the first 5 messages you don’t even give me a “what about you?” then I’m immediately checked out. I understand there’s a bit of an expectation for guys to lead and also everyone navigates conversations differently but that’s heavily outweighed by my exhaustion at carrying every conversation with a new potential partner.

At first I thought it was my fault, like maybe I just wasn’t interesting enough, or maybe they’re just boring texters and they’ll be fun on a date (I guess I’m mostly talking about dating apps but it seems like most relationships start through texting no matter what these days), well these people are just as boring in person, if not more. I still remember being on a date with a girl and basically conducting an interview asking all the questions and trying to make her laugh while she just… sat there? Threw in a “haha yea” every couple of seconds with no follow up, no opinions, no questions, no jokes, no NOTHING, longest night of my life. Like you know you’re supposed to make yourself seem attractive to the other person right?

Nowadays I just don’t even give these people a chance anymore. Sometimes I’ll throw in a “soo… is there anything you want to talk about or ask me?,” but I feel like I shouldn’t have to ask that in the first place to someone who is SUPPOSEDLY interested in me.

Alright so I’m the same guy who made the “black woman are beautiful post” and it seems like I got a lot of positive but also negative comments on that post. So I just wanna address a few things.

It was a vent post. When you vent, you express your raw emotions. So yes the post sounded very affectionate because I’m VENTING. What I said wasn’t up for debate. I wasn’t making any arguments. They were simply my thoughts on black woman and nothing more which got triggered because I saw a beautiful black woman walking past me. I expressed how I felt in that moment.

I didn’t say black woman were more beautiful than other races. I didn’t say I was only attracted to black woman. Complimenting common features that black woman have isn’t fetishism. I saw some people say I was horny when making it? Very weird to sexualize an admiration post.

I saw that some people weren’t happy that I assumed every black woman was beautiful??? First of all, weird thing to get annoyed at, and second of all, I never said I was attracted to every black woman roaming the Earth. I just believe they’re beautiful in general. I’m not quantifying anything.

If you found it cringe, then cool ig. But yah it was simply a harmless post. I didn’t want anything out of it. Yah that’s really it.

I (m 29) have completely fallen for my coworker (m 31). I adore him, but I know he’s straight. We have worked together for about three years now and have been through some tough things together (our manager we were close with passed due to cancer recently) and have grown a lot closer in our grief.

I have had these feeling for a while now, but recently they’ve gotten worse, and it’s been putting me into a depression. He’s also going through relationship troubles (he got kicked out of his house by his girlfriend…ex now) and so I’ve been trying to help him, I’ll buy food and things he needs for him, and get him little gifts.
But seeing him every single day at work, being close to him, pretending like I don't feel this way is incredibly painful. It’s exhausting to smile and act normal when my heart is aching. I can’t tell anyone I know how I feel, especially not at work. So I am letting my secret out here. Thanks for listening.

I keep hearing people complain about their housemates always being at home, never leaving the house to them, how annoying it is etc. It upsets me that I'm that person.

I barely leave my room, I don't spend too much time in common areas. But I also don't occupy the bathroom for longer than 20 minutes when I shower, I only cook in the kitchen and eat in my room. I leave both clean. I follow our cleaning schedule well enough. I'm very quiet. I don't bring guests.

But the problem is that I'm at home anytime my housemates return.

I study a very demanding course, somedays I skip lectures just to study at home better. I prefer studying at home than at libraries so that alone keeps me at home a lot. And when I rest, all of my hobbies are done indoor. I don't have much friends and I don't like going out anyway.

I can tell it annoys my housemates. They do sarcastic jokes about me never being busy, never going out, asocial etc. One time I told one that I don't appreciate the joke, and she just apologized in the same sarcastic tone.

On the on hand, I understand why it annoys them. On the other hand, I pay as much as they do and I feel like the amount of time I spend in my room should only concern me. But I also want to keep in good with them.

It's just something constantly in my head anytime I'm around them.

I'm from Turkey and my country, Istanbul specifically is famous for stray cats. I can't believe people find this cute.

It's not fucking cute. They live horribly and they die horribly. Either dogs will kill them or cars will run over them if not the diseases.

I don't want to get graphic but I tried to save so many of them by rushing to the vet. Not all of them made it.

Stray animals should not be a thing. Romanticizing them is so selfish and stupid. I hate all of you who do that. I hope you end up in the streets like them one day.

nothing against people who smoke I’m just so tired of everyone coming back from break and reeking of cigarettes

i usually have to walk away from what I’m doing and take a breather because the smell/lingering smoke flares my asthma so bad and makes me nauseous 🫩

I’ll (27F) start by saying that I love to sleep and have been the “sleepy friend” for as long as I can remember. I can easily sleep uninterrupted for 15 hours, granted I don’t work the next day…

The paradox of my adult life is that while simultaneously being obsessed with sleeping, I’ve developed a ridiculous amount of anxiety around going to bed and it’s getting worse the older I get & the harder work gets. On weekdays I could be physically fighting to keep my eyes open at 3am but it feels as if my brain refuses to let me rest. I equate falling asleep to “accepting that tomorrow has started” and I feel physically ill sacrificing my late-night-window-of-freedom (or so I call it) before I have to start another 10 hour day behind a computer screen. I’m drained by end of it, I don’t want to talk to anyone after being in meetings all day, I don’t want to pursue any hobbies, I stopped working out, I’m eating one meal a day. I feel like a shell of myself.

It’s genuinely ruining my life. I get about 3-4 hours of sleep every night and then spend 50% of my weekend making up for it. I feel so angry with myself while I’m actively doing it but I can’t stop. I feel like I’ve tried everything: different bedtime routines, no screens, medication, supplements, new bedding, etc.

Will this ever end? Will I ever be the kind of person that can go to bed early, get a head start on the day and not feel like my life is merely a constant loop of exhaustion and dread between zoom meetings?

Just needed a place to vent. My employer told me I haven’t been performing well despite me working my ass off. I have mental health issues but I do not share this with them.

I had a video call with my VP to discuss my supposedly bad performance. I had major anxiety about this call, I mean who wouldn’t? I was stuttering and stumbling over words. She asked me if I was on drugs. I responded “legally prescribed ones, yes. I do not use recreational drugs”. It’s like she didn’t even hear that. She then proceeded to say “if I ordered a drug panel, would you pass it?”

I’m in my head right now so bad. “Are you on drugs” is going to stick with me for the rest of my life. It is actually hurtful. Fuck my mental illness, fuck my job and fuck my life.

Edit: spelling errors as usual

Me 16f and my girlfriend 15f have been together for almost a year now, and as much as I hate to admit it I’m starting to hate her. She’s so rude and hateful all the time, and she doesn’t even seem to realize it?? She also so so condescending which is strange because in the nicest way possible, she isn’t very bright…😬 I want to break up with her but I am scared because I don’t want to hurt her feelings, and also she’s friends with all my friends so what if they get upset with me for breaking up with her?

I have just graduated university. Throughout the 3 years I did not make any friend. My parents are bad people and also do not have lives worth living. My brother died shortly before I went to uni by suicide. For the first year, I didn't do much. I had good flatmates who often asked me to join them but I would always decline, funnily they were the last people to ask me to do anything. I'm short, not good looking and don't have a good ethnicity so naturally people don't want much to do with me. Heck, I wouldn't even want anything to do with me. Next couple years I got in shape and tried to go to some societies and some nights out but the cards were stacked against me and I had no experience being in social situations because I've never really had friends that do stuff with me so nothing would really come of it. Sure people were nice to me and tried to keep me included but I didn't manage to make any friends. I was smart and was ambitious so I distracted myself with ambitions and endeavours (specifically online) and I met some people but nothing that stayed around. Now that I've graduated I assume that things will only go down hill. I guess sometimes people just don't get a chance, but I have an indescribable hate watching everyone else live their lives and I don't get to do anything. So many things that come as a guarantee in other peoples lives I have to work years for alone, while other things will just be unachievable.

In January I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and so they prescribed me meds with lamotrigine in it. In February I’ve got diagnosed with lymphadenitis and so they prescribed antibiotics with amoxicillin in it also telling me to keep taking lamotrigine. 2 days later I woke up with my face swollen and my whole face red so I went to another doctor bc I figured out that I had an allergic reaction to amoxicillin, 2nd doctor changed the antibiotics telling me that it can’t be lamotrigine, told me to keep taking it and called it a day. Another 2 days later the skin from my lips and tongue started coming off, my eyes were swollen and filled with some kind of liquid, at some point I couldn’t see and I had a high fever but everyone was telling me that maybe that’s how I go through allergic reactions since it was my first one ever. I went to sleep and the next day I woke up I tried to scratch my face and the skin from my forehead just melted off.

I went to the ER spent the whole night there for them to tell me that it’s mononucleosis and told me that I can keep taking lamotrigine. They couldn’t find a proper hospital with an isolation ward so I was supposed to just stay where I was and hope for the best. Luckily my mom is a nurse and got a spot for me in the hospital she works in. I was getting worse, blisters started showing on my neck and face, atp I couldn’t drink anything besides water, I couldn’t walk. I still remember the horrified face of a nurse that tried to take an IV out and while taking a bandage off she also took my skin with it.

They transported me to a different hospital where a dermatologist could see me and there they told me that it wasn’t lymphadenitis or an allergic reaction to amoxicillin but **toxic epidermal necrosis** from taking lamotrigine. The fact that my lymph nodes were swollen was the start to my allergic reaction, all of the doctors telling me that it’s okay to keep taking lamotrigine made it all happen.

They transported me to a specialist hospital with a burn treatment unit (bc with **TEN** they treat your skin as in II or III degree burn). 100% of my skin came off, the mucous membranes sloughed off. I spent a month there choking on my own blood since also the inside of my mouth was just raw meat. I had to be put on steroids and antibiotics cuz there was a high chance of me getting sepsis. I had to relearn how to walk, I don’t remember first 2 weeks bc I was put on the highest dose of f3ntanyl (or maybe at this point morphine? But I remember that first few days it was just f3nt) but even tho I remember snapping back to consciousness twice during procedures and the pain I’ve felt- I don’t wish it on my worst enemy. After those 2 weeks I kept hallucinating which was the only good and funny thing I remember.

Month passed I’m out of the hospital, I have to rush to the ER since my eyes got all swollen and I couldn’t see. There they tell me that TEN just started in my eyes, that the skin from under my eyelids is coming off and that I have to be put on steroids and immunosuppressants. I developed acute dry eye syndrome and now I have to put eye drops in my eyes every 10 minutes. We still don’t know if my vision was damaged since I still can’t see with my left eye from it being dry- luckily my right eye is in a better shape. All I know is that I have to keep buying eye drops till the day I die.

I don’t produce tears anymore. I can’t even cry about it.

My hair fell out, my nails came off (at least some of them before they had to remove them manually \[lots of pain\]). My whole body is covered in scars and hyperpigmentation.

They fired me from my job for being absent too long.

Had to move back home after building my own independent life for 2 years.

All I wanted is to get better with the pill, to be a better person to myself and others. How do I deal with this. I’m 21, I’m ugly, I’m a walking egg. How do I not fall aparat

I get it, life is subjective, objective, whatever you want to call it or look at it, but man on man is it exhausting. I feel like we have lost the plot on life. Live a good life be good to others and just be present. I feel like we as a society within the last few years have let money and material things overwhelm us. Like how are we okay with the current world and the things we have to do to survive?( Wants Vs Needs)

This is why i say we have lost the plot on life. We have deemed it okay to do things that make no sense or are just not practical with the hope that things will change or make us feel better.(Living a 'Good Life') Ive caught myself in this trap a few times, and like clockwork I talk myself out of it, but I'd be lying if i said i did not have moments of folding. Sometimes I feel like wouldnt this make my life better?

Im typing this tired af, and i get it if it doesn't make sense, but yeah, maybe when I have a bit more energy I can articulate a bit better.

My wonderful mother thought it would be a great idea to not only replace, but also throw away all of the old but perfectly fine pillows in our house.

These new ones absolutely SUCK!!!! THEY'RE TOO HIGH AND TOO STIFF AND THEY MAKE MY SILK PILLOWCASE FEEL GROSS. WHAT THE FUCK WAS SHE THINKING???

It is almost 3am and I've just been sitting up and slamming the pillow against the bed and wall, throwing punches at it.. God this is fucking miserable I want my old pillow back I just want to sleep.

Update: I've made a somewhat decent makeshift pillow by putting 2 smaller cushions into my silk pillowcase. It's... Something. At least it's not painfully high to a degree that makes my neck hurt

I was laying in bed thinking about getting up to turn off the heater, and next thing I knew I was on the ground and my husband was asking me what happened. I had no memory of getting out of bed and no idea how long I'd been laying on the floor, but my husband says it was only seconds.

I split my lip a little, my face is a bit beat up, and I have a few tender spots all over my body, so I must've hit the ground hard.

I'm on a few meds and just started a new one, so that's probably why. But it was fucking scary.

I am temporarily depressed due to life circumstances but am treating it and in therapy and all that jazz.

Anyways, for 10+ years I self medicated my ADHD with coffee and pot. I would do my work by drinking coffee and I would become super focused and calm. I'd vape THC/CBD throughout the day at work to be nice at meetings because stimulants make me little aggressive, and with autism its easy to forget to mask.

Now, I am 3 weeks into the Paxil and another anti depressant and I feel pretty damn good about life. I have a lot of energy, and amazingly, am sleeping well. The first 7 days on Paxil were rough on the sleep.

I'm back to exercising, doing work, etc.

But one thing is obvious. I cannot drink coffee anymore. Wow. Is this how normal people get affected by coffee?

Now, if I drink my espresso, it's like cocaine (I think) is to normal people. It makes me feel very restless and with a lot of nervous energy, and I've only gotten that feeling in the past when I drink like A TON (like 4 espressos in a morning).

So anyways, here's to me being awake at 5:40am because I went to sleep at 9PM, and I'm awake without coffee and energetic.

Here's to treating depression!

I have a medical pot card and am still using it but it doesn't seem to have much impact other than slowing my thoughts down a little, which is good. I have severe trauma from what happened to cause me to be depressed, so I think I'm gonna keep the pot because it helps me get back to sleep when I have insomnia.

Okay so first of all, I’m not ungrateful. This just might come across as such.

So I have hated my birthday for the longest time. It makes me uncomfortable to receive praise for something I have absolutely nothing to do with. I also don’t like being the centre of attention. It’s so bad that I lie to ”semi-random” people when my birthday is. I’m trying to learn away from it though.

Every year my family asks me ”what do you want for your birthday?” Every year I answer ”I don’t know. I don’t need anything.” Well this year I actually said on multiple occasions that I need new running shoes. I told the spesific model and size to my family.

Well I didn’t get the shoes. Why ask if you’re not going to buy said thing? And I know it’s not about the money because what I ended getting would have covered the shoes easily money wise. Don’t get me wrong, what I got was very thoughtful and I really like my present. It’s just that for the first time since being a kid, I actually told them what I wanted when they asked. Makes me scratch my head a bit.

That’s it. Thank you. Just wanted to put this somewhere because I would never say this to my family.

Hi, I'm sadly not really attractive, I got a weird nose, I'm overweight, I have pretty empty looking eyes, I'm overweight and even while I lost weight people just don't treat me right.

I often hear mean comments, never was anyone's choice even years ago someone else said why my friends (well ex friends) gonna hang out with such a loser. I never did anything wrong besides being not attractive.

It's been so long of being nobody's choice, of being ugly of not getting even a fair chance in anything.

Yesterday I heard a mean comment again in a course asking me if I could do even (insert whatever) with my weight. I think it hasn't helped that I did wear an old hoodie which was 2 sizes bigger than what I'm actually wearing but, it still hurts. I'm now 27 and people sometimes still treat me some kind of monster simply because I'm not attractive.

I lost weight, my face got smaller, I'm just not good looking. It's sadly still bad enough for people treat me being less worth. Character hasn't meant much for People around, being supportive or a great listener neither.

When it comes to dating, people simply blocked me or ghosted me when they saw my face.

I'm really thinking about weight loss surgery and facial surgery at this point.

wanted to avoid feeling this vulnerable and breaking down for so long, but this actually hurts deeply. i genuinely cannot stomach how horrible i feel right now.